Best Man at Wedding: What are some good pranks/jokes for best man speech?
May 23, 2010
I already know the "keys to apartment" joke. Any other similar ideas that you’ve experienced?
I’m writing my own speech but want a good joke/prank. Having a hard time coming up with something original, so i’m turing to the internet! lol
Wow it seems some of you have a hard time reading. I clearly put joke/prank. Which means not just pranks or jokes but perhaps both or only one. Hence the "/" Literacy in America really impresses me.
hooah: Clearly you haven’t been a best man. Jokes can be effectively used to improve the speech. Your childish comments need to be kept to yourself.
CindyLu: Learn what function a slash or stroke " / " performs in the english language. Again, literacy is outstanding here.
the only thing you want to do is not make fun or let the joke hurt the bride or make her question anything… this is a day of fun yes… but these two people are joining their lives together and this day is very important… make a joke or two that both of them would appreciate.. if you are the best man, you should know some funny stories… stick with those…
16 Responses to “Best Man at Wedding: What are some good pranks/jokes for best man speech?”
Really, when the best man is trying to be funny he ends up looking like a huge A$$hole.
Just be gracious.Be nice. Keep it short. You aren’t the entertainment for the evening.
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By KH on May 24, 2010
tell em about the time you gave him a reach around and was just pretending to be drunk?
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i heard it from a mate of yours im telling ya
By mr truthy speak speak on May 24, 2010
Example of a Best Man’s speech
<< prev page^ home ^ next page >> Here is a funny example of a best man speech that has given by our speech writer – Ryan Marshall
There are probably elements of it that you could use in your own best man speech.
Example of a Best Man’s Speech
Ladies and gentlemen; bride and groom.
May I first say that the bridesmaids are looking absolutely smashing today (winks and points to one in a flirtatious yet funny way), and, only rightly so, second to none to our lovely bride, Lauren. I’m sure you will all agree with me there.
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Ryan Marshall, a long time friend of Thomas’. I’ve known Tom for 15 years; ever since I blew my nose on his glasses case back in school. Since then, we have had many epic adventures together: from running away from school, running from the police, bar brawls, women and trips around the world. So the time we have spent together means that Tom has, in a way, shaped my sense of humour – so if you find this speech rather unfunny, you can blame him.
So, Tom – my wingman; my partner in crime. After all of our evenings in the pub with Tom chasing women around the pool table with his tongue hanging out in a drunken stupor, he finally found the woman of his dreams. For those who entered the lottery of this magnificent number, and Tom, we all know your lucky number now, 86. So, if you have that raffle ticket there’s a free drink waiting at the bar for you.
But Tom and I have had many memorable experiences together, that even now we still share over a pint:
our days off school, Tom making a cigarette out of a piece of A4 paper, our trip to America and our falls down the ski slopes – too many times we have come close to death. And now I have the honour of sharing the top table with him and standing as his best man. And for that, thanks mate.
Last week I asked Tom what he wanted from the marriage; he said long lasting love and a family, and of course, Lauren. Later that day I asked Lauren the same question. She replied: a toaster and a microwave. You see men – some are easy to please.
But, as I have had my orders from Lauren and Tom not to mention the stag night at String-fellows, I have had no alternative in finding another funny and embarrassing story to share with you.
So here goes:
On our ski trip to America in 2002, Tom and I had to share a bed – so Lauren, I know what you’re going through. Here is the number of my therapist if you need him. But anyway, it was cold and snowy when we arrived. Tom has always been a joker and the first thing he did when we got to our hotel was hide a rubber snake in my bed. It was 3 in the morning when I discovered it, and I nearly fainted. But instead of helping me, Tom sat back with a cup of coffee and laughed until he cried.
Unamused, I plotted revenge. The next night I opened the patio door on our second floor room, and carried him outside whilst he was sleeping. After I had locked the door, I woke him up. He was in nothing but his underpants. I told him that if he didn’t apologise I wouldn’t let him in – being a stubborn 17 year old he refused and chose to climb down the drainpipe instead. Half way down I opened the door and went to watch – the sight was hilarious. Picture this: Tom, 30 feet above the floor in only his underpants and stuck as the ledge beneath him had broken. I couldn’t stop laughing, and had no way of helping him either.
As for him, it got worse. It started to snow. And snow heavy. After a few more minutes of laughter and bombarding him with snowballs, I began to worry. He was turning blue, but me being the brains of our operation, had a plan. I got dressed, went outside and placed a skip under him to cushion his landing. After persuading him, for around 5 minutes, to fall into it, he let go and missed the skip.
He never forgave me for misplacing the skip. Nor, for getting all our other school friends outside to watch him.
Anyway that’s enough embarrassment for him today.
Tom has been a changed man since he met Lauren – not going to the pub so often so that he can spend more time with her. And nowadays he always has the largest smile on his face, one that they both have and I hope will keep for the rest of their lives.
Finally, there are a couple of thank-you’s that I’ve been asked to say.
Firstly, the seating arrangers. There was a method to where you are seated – the gift list. Mentioning no names, but Sue and Barry at the back, thanks for the candles.
Secondly, there are two people who have worked very hard in making tonight possible, so first a round of applause for them. Ladies and gents, the bar staff.
But on a serious note now, a massive thank you to everyone who has contributed and made Tom and Laurens day so wonderful.
Ladies and gentlemen. Please could you all stand and raise your glasses, and join me in wishing them both all the love and happiness a couple can possibly have.
To Thomas an
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ITS QUITE LONG, BUT I READ IT AND I THINK ITS FAB
good luck x
By MiniBingo:D on May 24, 2010
I used to do a fair amount of MCing and I developed the philosophy that whatever you finally decide to say, remember no one came to hear you, and to an audience, the most beautiful words are "and in conclusion".
One thing I would NOT mention is anything related to the groom’s past romantic episodes. Brides and bride’s parents want to keep the illusion that he waited for them.
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By Msean on May 24, 2010
Don’t do that. This is the time to be sincere, thoughtful and courteous. Small jokes in the speech are fine (nothing brash and nothing crude) but pranks are just uncalled for. You would be remembered better by not having a dry eye in the house.
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By daVIDica on May 24, 2010
Watch the movie Norbit or The Wedding Singer.
Or, tell him "they" miss his frequent visits to the STD clinic.
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By Client_u on May 24, 2010
Try using this line..
" i will always remember my first words towards the bride, when we first met,… lets not turn this rape into a murder "
When repeated at my wedding, the guests found this highly amusing.
good luck
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By Tyler on May 24, 2010
the only thing you want to do is not make fun or let the joke hurt the bride or make her question anything… this is a day of fun yes… but these two people are joining their lives together and this day is very important… make a joke or two that both of them would appreciate.. if you are the best man, you should know some funny stories… stick with those…
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By Jeanette on May 24, 2010
I don’t know the "keys to apartment" joke. but long toasts and speeches at weddings are the worst. keep it short and sweet and keep away from private jokes between you and the bride or groom. if you 2 are the only ones who are going to get the joke, leave it out.
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By I luv my love on May 24, 2010
The speech:
I am going to keep this short just like the groom.
And in conclusion, I wish the both of you the very best for the rest of your lives. If you need anything I am here to help.
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By donthaveaclue on May 24, 2010
This marriage is one that was made in heaven. Then again, so is thunder and lightning.
OK, well it’s lovely to be here in this wonderful village hall. Funnily enough I was here just a few weeks ago when I was asked to speak at the local Alcoholics Anonymous* monthly meet".
Pause – looks around the guests slowly……
"And I must say it’s good to say so many friendly faces back again"
Today I’d like to take this opportunity to pay tribute to a man who personifies intelligence, ambition, tact, generosity, and integrity. But it is <grooms name>’s wedding so it’s only fair that I talk about him as well.
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By Peace & Love on May 24, 2010
Please don’t do that and ruin the most memorable moment in your friend’s wedding. A light joke here or there is acceptable if it’s completely tasteful, but be sincere for the most part and make him proud he chose you for the event. Save the stupidity for the bachelor party!!
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By oldtrash06 on May 24, 2010
Don’t do it. I’ve been a bridesmaid 12 times and the few times when the best man "tried" to be funny he came across like a real jerk. In most cases you think the groom and bride will find it funny but they NEVER do. Trust me! It’s their wedding day and they are expecting a short and sweet speech that doesn’t shock, offend or look tasteless in front of their parents, co-workers, 90 year old grandmother and other friends. One wedding I was in the best man isn’t even on speaking terms with the couple anymore just for talking too long during his speech and trying to be funny.
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By Luv2Answer on May 24, 2010
Well it doesn’t involve the speech but…
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Write on the bottom of shoes
Someone once took a large black ink marker and wrote "Help" on the bottom of the groom’s left shoe and "Me" on the bottom of the right shoe. So when he knelt down for his vows, the entire congregation saw it. Of course, this will only work if he must kneel with back to congregation (i.e. Catholic wedding). Make sure you get it so that it is readable with the shoes side by side, left to right, toes toward the floor. Do this far enough in advance so that the paint is dry before the groom wears the shoes to avoid damaging carpets.
Besides "Help Me", other possible message to write on the soles are (with varying degrees of cruelness): Left Shoe (I’m With) Right Shoe (Stupid [pointing arrowhead]); Left Shoe (Quick, Call 911!) Right Shoe (Never Mind, I’m Doomed!)
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Make sure that if you do this, it will be taken well and not met with disapproval!
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By catyc58 on May 24, 2010
As Best Man if you were to pull some juvenile prank at my wedding it would come to a halt while I kicked your stupid a*s*s all over the reception hall. A wedding is NO PLACE for pranks save it for the frat party.
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By CindyLu on May 24, 2010
Well lets see… It is your day to be funny after all. Thats why people have weddings so the best man can have his moment in the spot light.
Maybe if your really funny, the bride will want to meet you in the back…
Seriously dude, heartfelt speeches go over much better than childish pranks.
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I am a grown up
By Hooahh on May 24, 2010